Creatively Hilarious Home Description

Recently came across this description for a fixer upper that is so hilariously creative! 😆 Enjoy this good read! 📚 Do you have a fixer-upper home you need to sell? I can help you do that too. In fact, I have one coming up in Kent, WA this week!

“Here it is, literally the worst house on the street! The Seller has done the hard work of cleaning up the almost half-acre property (it only took 7 dumpsters!), so now is your chance to take it from here. Have you ever watched HGTV and thought, I could do that! ? If so, pack up your tape measure and start Googling how to identify a load-bearing wall because it’s time to put your money where your mouth is! The roof leaks, the floor creaks, and there’s a terrible draft, but this 3 bed, 1.5 bath home is very open concept. And by that we mean the inside is open to the outside because several of the windows are broken. There is a large, sunny window in the kitchen… and absolutely nothing else – a wonderful feature for someone interested in a bright reading space (and ordering take out for every meal). Now I know you’ve heard of a detached garage, but have you ever heard of a detached foundation?! Because that’s what you’ll find here in the large bonus room at the right of the home. And if you’re looking for a house that screams I’ve got bizarre and ominous energy, then honey stop the car because you’ve found it right here conveniently located off of US-301 in North Zephyrhills. If you need a place to stage your next post-apocalyptic zombie movie, this is it (the covered porch has really good rest here on your way to the safe zone vibes). And whether you like to turn up the heat or keep it cool, it won’t matter here because there is no HVAC system. Oh and don’t forget about the brick chimney that perfectly epitomizes how we all feel after 2020 – about to collapse and going nowhere (literally, there is no fireplace inside the house). What else can be say about this one-of-a-kind opportunity? It’s not in a flood zone and will be conveyed with clear title! But we don’t have a survey and the Seller has never seen the property, so buyers are strongly encouraged to do their own due diligence. And if you’re not interested in crying yourself to sleep every night while you rehab this home, might we suggest tearing it down and building a brand new one in its place? The neighbors would likely thank you.”

What did you think of this write up??? 🙂

DAISY CASILLAS
(206) 866-8090
ListingsFor1.com
1% Real Estate Broker – The New Normal™

Common FSBO Fair Housing Violations

This is only a movie clip, but I see these types of FSBO descriptions ALL. THE. TIME. Sometimes it feels like the general public gets all of their vast rea estate knowledge from movies, TV shows, and HGTV. 🤣 Take, for example, this movie I was watching last night. Just this little clip alone had FOUR fair housing violations in their FSBO ad. That is, if it had been a real FSBO seller. (You’re not getting your real estate advice from the tele, right? 😆) 🛑 Do you think federal, state, and local fair housing laws ONLY apply to real estate agents and firms? Not at all. They apply to the OWNER too whether you have an agent or not so watch out!

DAISY CASILLAS
(206) 866-8090
ListingsFor1.com
1% Real Estate Broker – The New Normal™

Arnold Schwarzenegger was a millionaire BEFORE becoming famous

Arnold Schwarzenegger. Not a name you associate with real estate, right?? Well, guess what folks! He did NOT make his millions from being the #Terminator or #KindergartenCop. He made it in real estate BEFORE becoming famous!!!! 😳😳😳

In fact, he was ONLY 25 years old when he was already a millionaire from real estate investing. 😳 Real estate is one of the safest long-term strategies for building wealth. But a lot of people don’t realize you can make real cash today in short time if you can live simply in the early years. 💵 No, I’m not talking get rich quick in one year. But in several years, it’s possible. How? By living simply and buying a small house or duplex, then trading UP. From a duplex, move up to a 4-plex. From that, move up to a 16-unit building, for example. Remember: your initial purchase must come from your own pocket and income source, BUT it snowballs from there due to equity built from appreciation and CASHFLOW income from the monthly rents! 💰💰💰

You learned something new today! 😊

DAISY CASILLAS
(206) 866-8090
ListingsFor1.com
1% Real Estate Broker – The New Normal™

Lower Interest Rate = HIGHER Purchase Price!

Buy land or buy a home! 🚨 Did you know that when interest rates are low, it increases the amount you can borrow?? 🚨 That’s why right now is a good time to find out if you qualify to purchase property. 🏠Historically, real estate is one of the safest investments one can make. Real estate doesn’t tank and rise like the stock market does. Plus, land does not depreciate like other assets! 🏕 DM, text, call, or email to talk about buying for investment, your FIRST HOME, or selling in the Pacific Northwest! ⬇️

DAISY CASILLAS
(206) 866-8090
ListingsFor1.com

1% Real Estate Broker – The New Normal™

Summer is the New Spring

A lot of people here in the Pacific Northwest don’t realize that real estate didn’t stop because of the governor’s stay-home “order.” We had a hiatus for three days but real estate is an essential service. Tens of thousands of people were in the midst of buying or selling a home when the coronavirus hit. One can’t just stop that midstream. Imagine the people who already gave their landlord or job notice, already paid for moving services, got a job out of the area, etc. We actually barely slowed down. Now that businesses are opening up everywhere, we are full speed ahead again. This year started VERY strong for Pacific NW home sellers due to low inventory.

Yet, it’s been great for home buyers too because interest rates have been so historically low. 🚨 Buyers! Don’t get stuck on the sticker price of homes! Focus on the monthly MORTGAGE. On average, you are likely to stay in a home for only 10 years. Is it better to buy a home during that time at low interest rates (plus gain appreciation later) or to rent and never get that money back EVER??? 🚨

Call, text, or email to talk to me about buying or selling a home at this time. Tons of actually helpful information on my website at ListingsFor1.com. 👈🏻👈🏼👈🏽👈🏾👈🏿

DAISY CASILLAS
(206) 866-8090
ListingsFor1.com